Hurry up and be a man already.

Seriously.

I can’t stand this. I’m trying to drop Facebook hints in hopes that maybe you’ll come find me. That’s not working. I’m currently sitting on the balcony hoping that either you’ll come here looking for me or I’ll see you when you go to leave the building. I know you’re home right now, and your only exit path is in my line of vision right now. I can’t even focus on the paper I’m writing because you’re all I can think about. Every time I see motion out of the corner of my eye, I think it’s you, and I glance up from the computer hoping that you’ll look up and make eye contact. At that point you’d realize how much you miss me right now and you’d tell me we should talk. We’d work everything out and then just keep going exactly as we were before. I wouldn’t be miserable right now and neither of us would have to keep playing this stupid game.

I hate it. I hate the way things happened. I hate how I’ve felt these past few days. I hate how upset you made me, and I hate that I’m angry at you. I hate my heart for still wanting you, and I hate you for doing this to me.

Okay, maybe that’s a bit much. I don’t hate you. But I am pretty upset with you. I mean, for heavens’ sake, do you have a conscience? And if you do-- and I’m pretty sure you do—then what are you doing just sitting around letting me be miserable? I want an explanation already. I want to know what we are and what we’re going to be. Where are we going? Where WERE we going, and why did you stop us? What is going on?

I’m not leaving this town without knowing what happened in your heart and your head. But I don’t want to seem like I’m in agony (even though I am), so I’m waiting for you to come to me and offer an apology and an explanation. But why do you have to keep me waiting for so long?